Struggling with Celibacy?

It’s easy when you have never opened yourself up to sex but for those of us that have already lost our virginity and decided that it wasn’t such a good idea, so we pledge to be celibate until marriage.. can often times struggle with it.

You may ask yourself:

Why should I stay pure in a time that does not value setting myself apart until marriage?

Everybody is having sex. Look at them, they are having sex and HAPPY. Meanwhile you’re one second away from giving it all up and joining them.

DON’T! virginity

Here’s 3 bible scriptures I read when I start struggling with my promise to God:

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is within you, whom you have [received as a gift] from God, and that you are not your own [property]?

– I Corinthians 6:19 (AMP)

Listen, when I read this scripture, it reminds me that I am not my own. This body does not belong to me. So how dare I just do with it as I will. I want to make sure this temple is somewhere the Holy Spirit can dwell, a great sacred place. Besides, how can my sin and the Holy Spirit inhabit the same space.

And do not be conformed to this world [any longer with its superficial values and customs], but be transformed and progressively changed [as you mature spiritually] by the renewing of your mind [focusing on godly values and ethical attitudes], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His plan and purpose for you].

– Romans 12:2 (AMP)

Most of the time when I’m struggling with celibacy is when I’m allowing the world to influence my way of living. So what everybody’s doing it, if everybody is going to hell does that mean I have to go? Certainly not! One thing I learned, is that everything that glitters is not gold. So yes, people may be having sex and yes they may be happy, but their souls are being crushed. Soul ties are being formed and soul ties formed outside of marriage is nothing but bondage. So I constantly pray that the Lord renews my mind and my way of thinking and I ask that He helps me to remember that I am the daughter of a King and I am in line for my inheritance and I certainly will not receive it if I’m compromising. Perhaps what I read in an article on celibacy will encourage you,

The voices of the world may loudly cheer for us to give our bodies away but the conviction of the Spirit must be louder if we’re to stay committed to serving God.

Allow God to renew your mind, He will give you a different perspective on being celibate. It won’t be this oh woe is me, I’m lonely, instead you’ll be more focused on what true intimacy is and how intimacy starts with the Father. True intimacy isn’t physical, it’s seeing one’s heart.

 No temptation [regardless of its source] has overtaken or enticed you that is not common to human experience [nor is any temptation unusual or beyond human resistance]; but God is faithful [to His word—He is compassionate and trustworthy], and He will not let you be tempted beyond your ability [to resist], but along with the temptation He [has in the past and is now and] will [always] provide the way out as well, so that you will be able to endure it [without yielding, and will overcome temptation with joy].

-I Corinthians 10:13 (AMP)

The Lord will not tempt you beyond your ability. That means, when you began struggling with celibacy, that you can overcome it. You’re not going to be tempted and stumble. So often times I remind myself, this is a small thing to a giant (in the words of rapper T.I). It’s light work, an easy feat. Yes it will test your strength, know it won’t feel good, yes it will test your courage, but sis, bro… YOU WIN! Isn’t that amazing to know. You can look that temptation, that struggle square in the face and know without a shadow of a doubt that the victory is yours.

Listen, during these times, I talk to myself and remind myself that I’m a born winner. Sometimes I even find myself throwing Muhammad Ali jabs. That’s right, I tell the enemy you gon get this work today. Lol You got to. Don’t let the struggle beat you down. Beat it down.









The enemy is real and just like Trinity 5-7 says:

Take the word and knock him down.

Your fight tools are the scriptures.

Lastly, I want you to know that you are not alone in your struggles. There are many of us going through this very thing. It’s okay to talk to about it, you don’t have to be silent. I encourage you in these moments to find solace in the Lord and not sex.

If you’re struggling and you just need someone to pray with you and for you, email me at I’ll be happy to send you prayers, add you to my prayer-book and even pray with you.

With Love and Blessings,







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