These are the two most used words from someone who’s really not fine.
We live in a society where everyone pretends to be fine, pretends to be famous, pretends to be rich. So quite naturally when someone asks that dreaded question “How are you?”, we reply with “I’m Fine.”
I’ve said it so much that it just naturally comes out before my brain can even think of anything else to say. Do you know how many times I’ve lied when I said it? Too many times to even keep count.
Why do we feel the need to lie about how we are really doing? I’ll tell you why, because the world makes you think that only the strong survive and it’ll make you feel that your problems are small compared to everything else going on.
I remember back BC (Before Christ) on the rare occasions that I prayed, I would always say “Lord, I know what I’m about to ask is nothing compared to the other things you have to deal with…” but the moment I came into the revelation of who Christ was, I realized that He is omnipresent. He is everywhere, all at the same time, meaning He can answer my prayers and yours at the same time. My prayers don’t take away from yours and vice versa.
So the world is wrong, your problems aren’t small. God cares about what you are going through. And when the world tells you only the strong survive, they are wrong about that too. In the kingdom, God says His strength is made perfect in our weakness- so if telling someone how we really feel means God strength is perfected in us, I say let’s tell everyone how we’re really doing.
No more lies. No more pretending. It’s time to be real with ourselves and others about how we’re feeling.
What I learned about pretending your fine.
- It robs others of the opportunity to be there for you. Did you know God has assigned people to your life, whether for seasons or a lifetime? These people were assigned to help you get through those “I’m fine” moments. When you tell them otherwise, then they aren’t able to operate in their assignment.
- It stunts growth. When you walk around telling people you’re fine when you’re not, you are stunting your own growth. By that, I mean you are keeping yourself bound to a situation that you desperately need freedom from. If you were to just open up and tell the truth about what’s going on with you, then you could be that much closer to a solution and resolve.
- It creates isolation. Isolation is the trick of the enemy. He wants to get you alone so that he can prey on you. That’s why he does his best to play mind games to keep you from reaching out to others for help. More than likely, you’ll hear things like, “Don’t bother her/him”, “you know nobody cares about you” etc. Don’t be fooled by the enemy. We care. We are the body of Christ and unless we’re all operating and functioning properly, the body can’t do what it was created to do. So we need you. And we need you to be truly fine.
I’m praying for everyone who’s dealing with a silent battle. I know what it feels like to smile when you’re slowly dying inside. There’s far to many people living in silent pain. In fact, that’s not what I would call living at all. Jesus says, “The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that you may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance [to the full, till it overflows].” John 10:10
I want to encourage you to find someone who you trust to talk to. Tell that person what’s going on with you so when you say those words “I’m fine” you can finally mean it.
I’m praying for you. Specific request or just to talk, feel free email me at firstname.lastname@example.org